Trying to Move On

It has been 3 days since we laid David Gabriel to rest.. I know now that this pain is not something I am going to be able to get over.. It is something I am going to have to learn to live with.. I can do that..

Sierra is physically well.. she is getting stronger by the day.. I didn't realize just how weak her poor little body had become during her pregnancy.. Jordan is taking good care of her physically and emotionally.. He and I have not always seen eye to eye.. in fact we usually don't , but we both love Sierra and want the best for her..seeing him with her, how can I not be proud of him.. He has been a rock for her through this all.. Thank you Jordan... I know that he will need a rock of his own when he needs to feel all of his grief.. perhaps his love will have strengthened her enough to be that for him.. just my theory..

Ron has been wonderful for me.. I know he is hurting too.. he is very good at trying to conceal his pain from me.. what he doesn't know is those incredible blue eyes are like crystal balls to me.. I can see what is inside of him.. what he is feeling.. I have been able to almost from the beginning of our relationship...

He knows more about me than anyone ever has.. he knows that under all my toughness there is a fragility that I cannot explain or admit is there.. that is where his strength carries me through.. he also knows.. that when he needs me.. when he needs to deal with his own pain, I can be just as strong as he needs me to be while still being his soft place to fall..

There is a sense of things getting back to normal around here.. there is still cleaning to be done.. there are meals to be cooked ... chelsea to take care of.. dogs to walk.. all of these things, while they cannot heal my heart or the hearts of any of us, can help us restore a sense of balance that while our hearts are broken.. Life carries on...

David Gabriel

My Grandson is not here.. I cannot hold him anymore.. His tiny body just couldn't survive just yet..He is in my heart forever he has his own place there.. No one will ever take the place he holds..He was beautiful and perfect in every way .. Holding him yesterday I felt the overwhelming knowledge that he is in his home in heaven and knows how much he is loved here..


Writing is how I deal with things.. and although the simple words cannot express my grief it is all I have to give..

Lil "G"

We didn't get the chance to know you
We cannot watch you grow
You will never speak our names
Or learn to ride a bike or throw..

Your voice sings on in heaven
If we listen we can hear
Although we cannot see you
We know that you are near..

From the moment we knew you were on your way
Our hearts filled with love
We cannot hold you in our arms
We know you see us from up above..

Good bye for now

David Gabriel McArter

June 21,2005 - June 21, 2005

Spoiling Me

I am getting spoiled.. It has been so long since I have had my honey home during the week.. and after being away from him for a week him having 2 days off feels like a honeymoon.. I don't know if I am going to be able to send him back to work Monday.. I told him I am gonna call his principal and tell him that I ain't ready to give him back yet.. It is only for a week but still Imma gonna miss him..

The last 2 days have been pretty good.. Sierra and I have talked .. we seem to still be at an impass but at least there is no hostility.. she and I will have to learn to redefine our roles in relation to each other as adults and as mother and daughter.. especially since she is going to be a mother herself soon.. It is hard to let go.. It is hard to not try to fix things for her. I am getting better at it.. well at least getting better about holding my tongue.. no matter how badly I want to say something.. I think by the time I can come to grips with our new relationship I will need stiches in my tongue..

Chris is another and more painful subject that I just am not ready to talk about yet.. sorry y'all.. Just do me a favor.. those of you that pray.. say one for me and for my son.. thanks..

Well time to get off here and cuddle on the couch to watch a scary movie.. Y'all have fun..

Life as Usual

Things have returned to almost normal around here.. I have a house to clean.. dogs to take care of.. (anyone want a dog).. Kids to run here and there.. Mom to look after.. and most of all my Honey to take care of..

There have been changes.. I now have grammy to care for as well.. I also do not have to spend all of my time taking care of Sierra and Jordan.. They let me know in no uncertain terms they want to be grown, make their own mistakes, do what they wanna do.. so I am going to back off and let them..(fall on their faces).. ohh I mean make it on their own.. It isn't that I don't care anymore.. I do.. It isn't that I am being mean.. I ain't.. I just can't keep helping and helping and then getting cussed and yelled at when things don't go in their favor.. let them learn on their own..

Back to my life.. I need to get outta here .. I have an appt with the nursing home to get everything taken care of for Grammy.. Y'all have fun..

Made It Back.. Barely

Well the trip from hell is over.. I am finally home.. I would say that this was one of the worst trips to FL ever in recorded history.. but I would most likely find out that it is not one of the worst but the worst... There are things that happened on that trip that I will not go into detail about here.. sorry guys but somethings just hurt too much to share.. Just suffice it to say that from my children's behavior.. I am learning what "tough love" is all about..

There were good things about the trip.. I got to know Chelsea's bf J a lot better.. turns out he is a really good kid.. I like him.. My dad liked him.. there are only 2 people I can remember my dad taking to so quickly in my entire lifetime.. one is Ron.. the other is J.. I thought that was pretty cool..

We did get in some beach time.. but frankly it was too damn hot to go to the beach.. so we left there and went to Glenna's.. thank you for your hospitality girl in the midst of your own exhaustion.. Love ya..

Mauritha ( my best friend of 15 yrs) gave us passes to Kennedy Space Center.. Chelsea and I of course have been there many times.. but J hadn't ever been .. it was pretty interesting to see it through the eyes of someone that didnt grow up around the space center.. gave me a fresh perspective on it.. I even learned a few things I didn't know about the Center and space exploration.. thanks J..

We got home Saturday morning around 8:30am after driving all night.. I was exhausted.. bringing my grandmother home was a lot more trying than I had anticipated.. and she was exhausted as well.. she was having some problems keeping anything on her stomach when we got here.. I thought I would let her rest for a bit and see how she did.. I laid down for a little while.. then got back up and went with Ron and Russ to the Cingular store.. where I promptly fell asleep in the parking lot.. ( good to see ya Russ).. anywho.. after lunch..( thanks Russ) Ron brought me home and I slept for another couple hours.. when I got up Grammy was still asleep..and Chris, Chasity, and Ian were here.. was great to see them.. even if it was through travel weary eyes..

Grammy woke up a little while later and asked for some water.. I gave her a few sips .. she couldn't keep that down.. so Ron and I decided rather than risk dehydration of a 91 yr old woman we should get her to the hospital.. we called an ambulance and they took her .. We met my uncle at the hospital.. Once Grammy was admitted we grabbed a bite to eat and came home for me to get some rest..

For some reason my sanity completely left me and I decided to clean house when we got home.. I put away clothes.. I cleaned out the van.. I did laundry.. I don't know where or how I had the energy to do any of it.. but I finally ran out of gas around 11:30 and then proceeded to sleep almost 12 hrs.. I felt better then.. I am still tired.. I need another 12 hrs sleep.. I don't know if it is all physical or emotional exhaustion that has got me .. I think it is a bit of both..

The best part of coming home.. Ron is here.. he is my rock.. my angel.. I was so happy to see him when he opened the door .. all I could do for a few minutes was just stand there clinging to him.. I couldn't move.. I couldn't think.. It just felt so good to be able to stand there in his arms and let go of all that had happened for just a few minutes.. I think more than anything .. he gave me the strength to go on with the rest of the day.. I love you honey..


Well looks like I have written a novella here so I think I will quit for a bit.. I have a regular ordinary Tammy day scheduled for today.. I am so looking forward to my regular chaos.. I will never again be too annoyed with my life for being chaotic.. I found out.. it can get a whole lot worse...


Y'all have fun..

It's A BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It has been a great day... first things first tho.. I am getting a grandson.. we found out this afternoon that Sierra and Jordan's baby is a big healthy boy.. I have said all along that it was gonna be a boy.. but to be proven right.. well lets just say grandma is doing the happy dance.. I would have been happy either way.. just the healthy part made me happy.. but it is nice to know so I will know what to buy to spoil this youngin rotten.. We also found out this is not a shy little boy.. he was laying in there with his little legs spread as if to say.. "Hi this is my penis".. definately not modest.. but that is ok.. none of us are overly modest around here either..

The first bit of good news came around 9:30 this morning.. my phone rang and it was someone looking for Jordan to inform him he had won a contest for a year's supply of free gas at the local gas station down the street.. this is a good thing and will be a benefit to them..

The second bit of good news was a call about my grandmother.. they have finally gotten her retirement benefits straightened out and will be mailed to her here.. this has been an ongoing battle for over a year now.. good to have it fixed..

The third good thing today was the lunch.. we had a good turnout .. it is always good to see friends.. thanks Gary,Mandy, Cynthia, Jim, Brandon, Todd and Betty.. was great to see you all..

Then the baby news.. it has been a great day so far...the only thing that could have made this day better would have been to have had Ron home with me.. but he will be home in a few hours..then the greatness of this day will be complete.. well time to go...

Y'all have fun..

At Work With Ron..

I decided to come to work with Ron today.. He has classes on Thurs and Fri. so I wouldn't be able to be here with him on those days... and I have things left to do to prepare for the trip on Monday... so I thought today would be a great time to get some extra time with my honey..

He made me cry today... Not in a bad way.. He posted one of his poems on his blog.. "Passion's Masterpiece" I remember the beginning of that poem... Where it came from.. I won't go into details..( you are welcome Russ) but suffice it to say this poem started after a wonderfully passionate and romantic time between us.. It took him a while to finish it.. The funny part was that when he did finish it.. he didn't add much to it.. I thought it was perfect the way that it originally was so he left it that way with the minor exception of the last line..I love his poetry.. and I would be lying if I said that I don't love the ones he has written about or for me just a bit more.. there is just something even more wonderful about him using his enormous talent to tell me again just how much he loves me... Not that he needs to tell me .. He shows me every day..

I don't have the gift that Ron has... So I will just leave it at this..

Poet of My Heart.. I am going to miss you.. I always feel you beside me.. around me.. as much a part of me as the air I breathe.. that will make it bearable until I can be in your arms again..

Where Have I been?

It has been a while since I have blogged.. sorry bout that.. and no I didn't get kidnapped by aliens again.. just got away for a bit.. got to go with Ron on a 2 day mini vacation.. well vacation for me and the kids.. work and classes for him.. but I think over all we all had a good time.. Next week I won't be blogging much either unless I can blog from Glenna's puter.. I will be in FL most of the week.. taking Kyle and Chel to their dad.. and picking up my grandmother.. that will be a trip and a half I am sure..

The thing that sux the most about the trip to Fl is not that I will have to see my ex.. that sux enough but, that I won't have my Ron with me.. I hate being without him.. I know I won't sleep.. I won't eat right.. I won't feel like me until I get back home.. I guess I will have to try to figure out some way to stay busy until I can leave.. Last year I cut my trip short by a full day in order to get back home to him..

Well I guess I had better get off here and get some rest and spend as much time with my honey as I can making up for lost time before we actually lose it..

Y'all have fun...

The first ultrasound  

Weekend

Here it is another Sunday evening.. that is the thing about weekends.. they always end.. this one has been a really good one..

Friday was a too tired to head out to Todd's night.. that was fine with me.. I wouldn't have minded singing but, I can do that at home.. there was much cuddling and movie watching.. can't do that at todd's.. well the cuddling yes.. but it is too loud in there to hear the tv.. anywho.. we got up saturday and went out and about as described in Ron's blog .. I got a really pretty dress that I think I will wear to Sierra and Jordan's big wedding ceremony in July.. It is white and fits me well that is always a good thing..

Today has been a lazy type day.. I have read most of the day.. Ron has been on the puter.. I even got to take a short nap.. It is good to have a lazy day most of the time.. the house is pretty much in order.. the laundry doesn't need me to do anything but change it from machine to machine to basket.. and dinner was a breeze.. fried pork chops and mexican rice with diced tomatoes and corn.. it was good.. I took a hot bath and washed my hair.. I think the rest of the evening will be just as relaxing and lazy.. I see more cuddling.. more reading.. more tv watching.. dang wouldn't it be nice if the weekends were 5 days and the work week were 2.. oh well so much for fantasizing.. I only have one thing that I must do this eve.. gotta make Ron's lunch for tomorrow.. but that is a labor of love so it is something I enjoy doing..

Speaking of which.. I think I will get off here and go do that .. so the cuddling can begin..

Y'all have fun

Thinking, Musing, Eating.

It just feels like I should be writing this morning. I am not sure what it is I am supposed to be writing about.. there is nothing particular on my mind.. there is nothing other than the regular worrisome stuff on my mind.. Just something keeps nagging at me to write.. So I thought I would sit down at the trusty computer this morning and see what comes out..

So far it has been an uneventful day.. it is only a little after 8 but I am hopeful that this is a trend that will last the entire day.. I do have a lot to do today.. I need to take Jordan and Chris job hunting.. I need to take Sierra for an appt.. I need to do some shopping for my Mary Kay party tomorrow.. and I need to do some seriously major housecleaning.. I hope that my wrist holds out for the day and allows me to do some if not all of the things I need to do..

I just went and woke up Chris.. he is a lot of things that bug me.. but I will give him credit for one thing..that is the easiest person on the planet to awaken.. just say his name.. and he is awake and ready to go.. It wasn't always that way with him.. he used to be like Chelsea.. beg, plead, threaten and pray that she gets up.. but when he turned about 12 he was up like a shot.. maybe this means she will out grow it too..

There are only 2 days left in the school year.. this is something that makes me immensly happy.. I love having them all home from school.. I get to spend more time with them that way.. yeah I know I am a traitor to mom's everywhere.. I just can't help myself.. when they were little and starting school I was miserable.. I hated leaving them there.. I hated that they would be gone for 6 hrs of the day and that I would miss that time with them.. I don't know why I am that way.. maybe it all ties in with the taking in every kid I see thing... and that my kids are my life thing.. don't know.. and honestly.. I don't care.. it is just how I feel..

Right now I am contemplating getting up and going to the kitchen to make something to eat.. I have had some sort of stomach thing going on all week and haven't been able to keep much of anything down . .. but this morning I actually woke up hungry.. hopefully that too is a good sign for the day.. Hey there are banana's in that kitchen.. they are good for me.. and they don't have to be cooked.. sounds like breakfast to me..

Yummmmmm I got my banana.. anyway.. I just thought I would see if by sitting here typing this nonsense above I could get this writing bug out of my ear for a bit.. Didn't work.. but I do have things to do and not enough time to sit here and try to figure out what it is I am supposed to be writing today.. Honey.. you are all up in my head.. see anything in there worth writing about?..

Y'all have fun..

Three

Ok.. this was on my honey's blog.. was just too good to not steal

Three is a Magic Number

Three names you go by:

Tammy
Baby
Mom

Three screen names that you have had:

Tammyjsdaqueen
Squeakyredhead
Troubleshandsful

Three things you like about yourself:

That I make friends easily
That I have love in my life
I have a sense of huimor

Three things you don't like about yourself:

My tendancy to anger
The way I look naked
The inability to trust

Three parts of your heritage:

German on dad's side
Indian (My grandfather was full blooded Cherokee)
Irish.. Explains the temper and hair

Three things that scare you:

Being unloved
Being alone
Spiders

Three of your everyday essentials:

My kids
my love
Big cup of coffee

Three things you are wearing right now:

Denim Skort
Pink Tank top
white thong

Three of your favorite bands or musical artists (@ the moment):

Martina McBride
Trace Adkins
Toby Keith

Three of your favorite songs:

My Daughter's eyes
God's Will
Keeper of the Stars (when Ron sings it)

Three new things you want to try in the next 12 months:

Getting things settled with kids and grandkids
going back to work
writing the book that has been in my head for years

Three things I want in a relationship:

Honesty
Respect
The Chest

Two truths and a lie: (in no particular order)

I love all my children (including step)
I am a CIA operative in deep cover
I love my crazy life

Three physical things that attract you to the opposite sex:

Eyes
Smile
Sense of humor

Three things you can't do without:

Ron
My kids
Coffee

Three of your favorite hobbies:

Writing
Cuddling
Singing

Three places you want to go on vacation:

Sweden
Mt Fugi
Hawaii

Three things you just can't do:

Bowl
not give someone a second , second chance
turn my back on someone I love

Three things you want to do before you die:

Be happy with me
See all of my kids happy and successful
Travel

Three celeb crushes:

Vin Diesel
Tim McGraw
Nick Nolte..

Ok they are not crushes.. but they are just Hot..

A New Step

Well.. It has been a strange couple of days.. I need to write.. I need to blog.. heck I think I need to scream.. I have already cried..

Sierra and Jordan got married yesterday evening.. I know all the practical reasons.. I know they love each other.. I know they have a baby coming.. None of these things makes me stop wishing that she were 6 again and still needed mommy to fix everything..

I want my children to be happy , that is all that I have ever wanted for them.. I have never had hopes that Sierra would be a world class designer.. or Chelsea will be a famous author.. or Kyle will be a world renound scientist.. or that Chris would be a lawyer.. all I have ever wanted is for my children to find happiness in this life.. I don't care what they do for a living ( as long as it is legal) I don't care what political or religious beliefs they hold.. Those are choices that I cannot make for them.. I can only guide them by what I believe in.. and hope that they make the right choices for them.. along this same line of thinking I cannot tell them when or with whom to fall in love..

I didn't want my children to have to struggle the way I have.. I didn't want them to have to scrape along.. but I guess again these are things they have to choose for themselves.. I can only be there to support and help them when they need me..

So in saying all of this I guess I am saying that even though I didn't want Sierra to marry or have children this young.. this is a choice that she has made for her life.. She loves Jordan.. He loves her.. hopefully they remember that love when times are hard , when they are struggling .. and it will sustain the relationship enough to allow them both to grow.. I am not unhappy about my daughters choice in young men.. I am just sad that it was made so soon..

Y'all have fun

Job Hunting Again

Well it is back to the dusty job hunting trail for Jordan.. long story short.. he got hurt.. got drug tested.. needs a new job.. he isn't smoking.. but he did .. and after looking up the test they use it can pick up usage for up to 90 days.. that just doesn't seem fair to me..

Ok.. I am not advocating pot smoking.. I am just saying that if you smoke a month ago and get hurt on the job chances are it isn't because you were high.. ya know.. that would be like saying the 6 pack you drank saturday night caused you to be intoxicated a month later and caused you to have a wreck.. makes no sense.. but hey that is me.. anyway.. we are out and about today hopefully he will find something soon.. I know the kid is trying.. that is why I will take him hunting.. he quits trying.. I quit helping.. he found that out the hard way.. anyway.. time to head out the door.. Y'all have fun..

Hot Hot Hot!!!!!!!!

I have been whining all winter about it being cold.. been wanting it to hurry up and get warm.. I got my wish.. Whewwww it is hot today.. Sierra, Jordan and I went to Nicholasville to see my best friend and to do some yard saleing.. we dang near melted.. it was 91 in Nick Vegas as we Lexintonians affectionatly call that town.. We did have a good time despite the heat..

We got some good bargains.. and found some yard sales where the people think you can get back what you paid originally for things.. Hint.. If you are having a yard sale.. that usually means you want to get rid of the stuff you are selling.. if you have 10 bucks on a dress that you paid 10bucks for.. you ain't gonna get rid of it.. the stuff isn't worth that much.. try again.. get out your little pen and paper.. and mark that DOWN.. geesh..

Sierra is no longer allowed to buy clothing.. This is not my rule.. she imposed this on herself.. she has informed me that she has too many clothes right now.. my thinking is.. yes..she does.. but most of what she has right now will not fit her in a few weeks.. she is getting bigger.. that happens when you are pregnant.. she will find this out.. She has found out already that if you happen to wear a size 0 before you get pregnant, it don't take long to not be wearing it once you are..

Well time to go get the Kyle.. honey.. good luck with the invasion of the 10 yr olds.. Later Y'all

Guys like you!

I was talking to Russ this morning about dating.. women.. single moms.. and he said something that made me think.. he was talking about step parents.. that when he was younger he and his step dad had their issues.. but, as he has gotten older he has realized what a tremendous job his step dad took on in marrying a woman with 2 kids.. got me to thinking..

I have a lot of friends that are single moms.. I was one too for a while.. the dating scene pretty much sucks for single parents .. It is hard enough to juggle working , being a mom or dad.. and having a life of your own without the pressure of dating..

When Ron and I started dating.. My kids at one point decided to collectively lose their little minds.. I was supposed to go out with Ron one night and I called to tell him that I was needed at home and wouldn't be able to go.. his reaction was to suggest he come to my place and watch movies with us.. I guess I didn't realize at the time how unusual that is for a man these days to actually want to be involved with the children of the woman he is dating.. I hear from my single girlfriends all the time that they feel like "dates" want them to choose between going out and being a mom.. I am not saying that we should always stay home and be a mom.. that there aren't times when we need to get away from the kids.. It just seems to me that if a man or woman is going to be in a relationship with a person that has children that they should understand that the kids come first to that person.. just my take on it..

I guess I was just lucky in that Ron is the type of man that understands that.. and accepts it.. and loves my children not because they are mine.. but because of who they are.. there aren't many men out there like that.. based on my conversation with Russ this morning.. there seems to be at least one more out there like my Ron.. Russ.. You ROCK..

ok.. done for today.. y'all have fun

Back to Lazy

Well it seems that my delivery services were not needed today.. I asked my friend yesterday if she thought she would need me.. she told me she didn't know.. and that she would call me.. I told her.. PLEASE call me.. Ok so I guess I sound a little desperate.. I just have really enjoyed working.. I guess I just didn't realize how much I missed making money and being out and about.

Ron was supposed to take the lawnmower to work with him today to get the guys in the auto shop work on it.. I was supposed to remind him and we both forgot.. so he called me around 8:20 or so and asked me if I could bring it to him at school.. the problem was I had no way to load the dang thing.. I can't lift it.. Russ had sent me an email to let me know he was off work today and to let him know if I wanted to get together for coffee.. so I waited til 10 and called him.. he was such a sweetie.. he came over and loaded the thing for me and rode to Winchester with me and Sierra.. we had a good time.. stopped for lunch.. talked .. those sorts of things..

I got to see my honey for about an hr in the middle of the day.. we didn't get to spend much time together.. but it was good to just be near him.. I even got the guys to check out my brakes.. they are ok.. One less worry for me for the trip to FL.. the thing that sucked is that we eventually had to leave.. I love seeing Ron in the middle of the day..but I hate having to leave .. cause I know I am gonna miss him for the rest of the afternoon..

There was one really funny thing that happened while we were there.. There were several of the students that were going totally gaga over Sierra.. she is pregnant.. but isn't showing all that much yet and she is a really beautiful girl.. most of the time she simply doesn't notice when guys are falling all over themselves... she is oblivious to the fact that she is beautiful.. but today it was hard to not notice when the one boy almost broke his neck trying to look at her and show off while driving a riding mower.. I was just hoping the poor kid wouldn't hurt him self..

Anyway.. It is almost time for my honey to get off work and I need to start dinner and finish laundry.. Y'all have fun..

Whewwwwwwwwww

Dang.. who would have thunk it? That delivering flowers would wipe a person out so much.. I am wiped.. Sierra and I did 10 more deliveries today.. after the 2 day marathon of 34 you would think 10 would be a breeze.. Not so.. One thing it is hot out today.. and Lexington traffic.. well lets not even get me started on Lexington traffic.. suffice it to say I wonder each and every day how some of these people not only got licensed in this state but how they manage to survive every day out on the roads..

Anyway.. Sierra and I finished up around 2:30.. grabbed our check and ran like hell before she could give us any more flowers to deliver.. actually she didn't have many more and she asked if we wanted a few .. we turned her down.. I needed to get home to Kyle.. thanks to Jordan he got picked up from school ok..

I love doing something to earn a little money.. Makes me feel like I am doing more than taking around here.. yeah I keep the house.. I take care of the kids mainly.. I cook.. but those things I would be doing if I were working full time still.. For me .. Making this little bit of money gives me back a bit of my self esteem that has been sorely tested in the last year and a half.. I normally know my worth around here.. It is just sometimes I feel that I need to be doing more.. I need to be making money.. paying bills.. all that good stuff..

So.. in saying all of that.. I want to thank Sierra, Chelsea and Ron.. I would not have been able to do my job without them to help.. and I wouldn't feel so good about finally doing something to contribute around here.. I feel more like me than I have in the last yr and a half.. (tired) but a good tired.. a tired from accomplishing something.. dang I think I might need a hobby.. I know I sing.. but that is too much fun to feel like I have done anything.. Oh well .. I am going to take the family out to Ci Ci's pizza for dinner tonight to celebrate.. Y'all have fun..

Lunch is Back

When I first met Ron he organized lunches each week for the chatroom that we frequent.. That is actually how we met.. anywho.. some of the roomies have been asking me if we were going to start having room lunches again so I took the hint and organized a lunch for today.. it went well (if not a little weird being Ronless) we went to friends and company which is one of our favorite restaurants..

There was a good crowd for the most part.. faces I hadn't seen in forever.. thank you Doug, Susan, Bryson, Jim, David, Vickie, Susanky,JimJknight, Janice, Chucky, and Kristen A.K.A Miss why.. was good to see all of you.. we talked about it .. I don't want to do the weekly lunch thing again.. gets expensive and it eventually wears down to just a few people.. what I would like to do is perhaps an every other week lunch.. I brought this up to the gang and they thought it was a great idea.. so we will see what happens..

Ron just called me from work to tell me that he misses me... How sweet is that.. I miss him too... He is always there beside me.. always around me.. even when I spend most of my days running round like a chicken with it's head off.. I still always have time to miss him...I don't think I tell him this often enough.. but I love it when he calls me in the middle of the day.. especially on days when it seems like I can get nothing done and I have been trying to accomplish something all day.. he revives me and gives me a brighter moment in my day.. which brightens my entire outlook..

Well time for Kyle... Have a good day Y'all

Oh Yeah..

For those that read this and have been wondering.. Sierra and baby are doing great.. she is healthy..The baby is growing at the normal rate.. and we have new ultrasound pics.. gonna find out if Ron knows how to put them here on the blog.. her next appt is on the 25th when we are going to confirm that it is ok for her to go to FL with me for a week in June.. Just thought I would update anyone that was interested..