My Morning So Far

It went something like this.. Alarm goes off.. I look at the clock..6:08 already?.. ok.. time to drag my lazy butt outta bed.. I stumble to the dresser trying to figure out why I cannot see.. Oh yeah.. My glasses are on the headboard of the bed.. stumble , whack my knee on the corner of the bed, there they are.. I put them on.. the world comes into soft focus.. too early for anything else.. I finally get back to the dresser without further injury and manage to pick up my clothes... then my bladder speaks up.. "BATHROOM NOW".. I wander mostly naked to the bathroom and tell my bladder to shut the hell up.. I am not awake yet..geesh.. bladder subdued I get dressed in the bathroom.. It is too much trouble to go back to the bedroom.. I know there are things in there just waiting for me to trip over them or for them to step out in front of me to hit parts of my body.. I am safer in the bathroom.. unless the bathtub gets evil ideas..Completly dressed and semi alert.. I head for Chella's room to begin the morning ritual of waking the dead.. "Chelsea get up".. I hear moans and grumbles.. "Chelsea.. You have to be at school early this morning.. get up".. more grumbling and moaning.. and a wheeze.."Chelsea... CHELSEA... OK..IT IS TIME TO GET UP!!!!".. she answers.."I'm up".. now I know from years of experience this is not the truth.. she is not up.. she isn't even awake.. it is just her body trying to get me to go away and let her sleep.. It never works.. but she keeps trying.. " Chelsea.. I am going downstairs.. I want you down there in 5 mins".. this time I get a mostly coherent.. " Ok Mom.. I am up.. getting dressed"..

I head downstairs.. where I say good morning to my honey and Kyle.. they are both up and have been for a while from the looks of them.. I head to my favorite spot in the morning.. My coffee pot.. OOPs.. forgot to set up coffee last night.. this presents all new opportunities for me to hurt myself.. the coffee filters are in the pantry..and that door likes to catch my fingers.. the coffee is in the freezer.. and our freezer is on the bottom of the fridge.. great.. that thing likes to hit me in the knee.. and then there is always the water.. it seems to know when it is me and decides I haven't done a good enough job of showering so it tries to wash me all over again.. I get my coffee made without serious bodily harm this morning.. and manage to stay dry.. I am doing well for me.. I look at the clock.. 6:18.. time to get Chris up.. He is easy.. " Christopher,.. time to get up.. ".. I hear sniffling, groaning.. and " ok.. I'm up.." I believe him.. he is usually pretty easy to wake..

By this time I realize Chelsea is still not downstairs.. Ron is heading up to do his morning thing.. So I know he will get her moving.. I sit down to spend a minute with Kyle.. I then realize it is freezing in this house.. Ron tells me to turn on the heat.. I don't know how.. This house has gas space heaters.. which I have no idea how to operate.. I tell Ron.. " I don't know how.." .. he gives me instructions.. I am thinking .. you know as clutzy as I am .. is it really a good idea to have me fiddling with natural gas and flames when I don't have clue what I am doing?.. Of course I can't get the dang thing to work.. Ron says he will do it.. Kyle and I go to the porch to wait for his bus.. by this time it is 6:25 and still no Chella.. the bus comes about 6:35.. I go back inside and there is heat coming from the confounded space heater.. apparently Ron has it working.. ok.. so I am not technically inclinded when it comes to appliances.. Ron goes upstairs , I hear him and Chella having words.. I can't hear what is being said but I know the jist of it.. he is telling her she IS getting up.. she is arguing from the middle of her bed where she is sitting under the blanket that she in fact IS up.. she does this every day.. I don't know why she thinks that we are going to believe her when she says " I am up" when this has been going on for years and we all know she hasn't given a second thought to putting her feet on the ground to get out of the bed... I yell up the stairs.. " You are fixin to get a butt whoopin if you don't get down here NOW".. ( translation for the hick impaired) (" I am going to spank you") yes..I tend to get a bit redneck when I get ticked off about something.. anyway.. Ron comes down.. still, there is no Chella.. by this time it is 6:39.. Ron comes over and is leaning on the back of the sofa.. he says.. " I am wondering if I should go to work now or wait for the beating".. I told him to do as he wished.. finally the brat came downstairs.. I brought her into the living room.. by this time it is 6:48.. I am not a happy camper.. it shouldn't take 40 mins to get out of the bed.. I tell her " Ok.. you will go to bed 1/2 hr earlier this evening.. and for every word of protest you make about this you will lose another 15 mins" her reply.. OK.. I think she's got it.. then I ask her if she would prefer her butt whoopin now or after school.. to this she protests.. I told her.. " It is gonna happen.. the reason you keep doing the not getting up thing is that you haven't had many consequences to deal with when you don't get up on time.. Now you do".. she grumbled something.. I told her to go eat.. she left..

Ron and Chris by this time are ready to leave.. I kiss Ron good bye and tell Chris to have a good day and they are off.. I go back in.. it is too damn cold to be out there long.. when I get in the house.. it is silent.. ahhhh just the way I like it.. but I find a definate chill coming from the chair where Chella has planted herself.. She isn't speaking to me apparently.. then she tries a new tactic.. " Mom.. I can't go to school early today.. I didn't get a note from Mrs. M.. and you have to have one to get in the school this early".. To which I tell her.. " Sorry kiddo.. but that ain't gonna work either.. I talked to Mrs. M after you left the conference and the school knows she has classes early on Tues. and Thurs. all you have to do is be there and she will meet us at the door".. dang another Chella bubble busted.. she tries to argue.. I say the 2 words that let my children know the subject is done and it would be best to hush.. " I'm DONE".. The silent treatment returns...

We leave around 7:20 she gets to school on time.. still not speaking much.. works for me.. I like quiet..she will talk when she wants something.. of this I can be sure.. she gets out of the car .. looks back at me.. " I love you mom" .. I tell her I love her too.. and I watch her walk to the front of the school..

I got back home, let the dogs out and sat down to blog.. so there ya have it.. my morning so far.. how is your day going?

Y'all have fun