Slaying Dragons

I have had it up to here ( hand at my forehead) with people who are either not in, don't know, or otherwise find creative ways to avoid talking to me.. Ron has informed those of you that read his blog of what happened with Chris this weekend.. long story short for those of you not reading his blog ( who wouldn't read his blog).. Chris was arrested on Friday for violating his bond release.. I spent the majority of Friday afternoon and all weekend wracking my brain to find out what the supposed violation was.. This morning I spoke with someone who seemed to have answers.(miracles never cease).. She works for the County Attorney's office and was the person who filed the violation with the Judge. She told me that the so called victim in this case reported seeing Chris at home.. OMG.. you don't mean it.. he was at home.. one of the two places he is allowed to be.. say it ain't so.. so instead of checking the conditions of Chris' bond release this product of modern legal thinking goes forth to get a judge to sign a warrant for Chris' arrest.. Hello Moron.. you are the people that imposed the conditions in the first place.. wouldn't you think you would know that by being at home he was complying?. Just a thought..

This morning.. I dressed in my judicial dragon slaying attire and prepared to kick some legal eagle ass.. I have called Chris' attorney.( the guy that didn't even have a clue his client had a warrant on him) and informed him of not only what the warrant was about but also the supposed violation while suggesting to him in no uncertain terms that I thought it was time for him to get off his butt and get my son out of jail NOW!!.. I was friendly.. firm.. ok.. pushy.. but friendly.. My next call was to the County Pretrial office where I told her what was going on.. they are the people that are in charge of people on bond release.. they are the ones doing the drug testing and giving permission for people on release to do things.. they also didn't have a clue why Chris is locked up.. they have a couple clues now..

Then it was on to the courthouse.. where I do believe there is a clerk needing to go home and change his shorts.. I really didn't do anything other than tell him what I wanted and let him know that I wasn't leaving until I got it.. the fact that he was less than 5 foot tall and wearing a bright pink sweater ( on the advice of queer eye for the straight guy no doubt) and that I have a certain smile that tends to chill even the most hardened civil servant into remembering they are there to serve us.. at any rate he got the information for me and even put the letters and documentation I had for the judge in the right place for me.. I thanked him and wished him a great day..

Now I am playing the waiting game.. I don't wait well .. I am patient when it comes to my kids, hubby, lines at the grocery.. but when it comes to an injustice of this magnitude.. I just can't seem to muster a lot of patience.. they weren't patient in putting him in jail for nothing why should I be patient in waiting for them to fix their mistake..

I just want my son out of there.. he did what he was supposed to do and still there he is in a cell.. what kind of message does that send.. No matter what you do you will wind up in trouble? .. that isn't what I am trying to teach my kids.. I do believe in our justice system for the most part.. I think a lot of it is bullshit.. but I do believe in the promise that justice is for everyone.. I do I do I do.. but lately it seems justice is a shadow lurking just around the corner so that things like this can come along and bite ya on the ass.. just my opinion..

I will keep ya updated as this situation develops.. but to leave ya with a laugh.. picture.. a 5ft 8 in 146lb redhead standing in front of a 5 story courthouse saying " Bring it".. I can take whatever they dish out.. just hope they are ready for me..

Y'all have fun..

Crawling Slowly Out Into The Sunshine

I know I haven't been blogging as of late.. I really have had a good reason..

It all started Friday.. I didn't feel good.. My back hurt and I just generally didn't feel up to par.. didn't think much of it.. It could have been anything.. I went about my normal routine as usual.. doing anything and everything I needed to do.. Running all over town like an idiot.. doing housework.. that kind of thing..

Saturday, the backache was still there.. I still felt funky.. still I pottered around the house.. Ron and I did some much needed shopping.. as the day progressed the sickness progressed with it.. by 5pm I was not a happy camper.. I felt like my insides were trying to get out.. and they were on fire at the same time.. this was decidedly unpleasant.. I took my temperature.. It was 101.8.. this was again.. not a good sign.. Ron and I had discussed going out singing , that plan was abandoned fairly quickly.. by midnight my fever was up to 103 and I was one hurtin unit..

Sunday..Ron called our doctor's office to get the on call Dr. to call back.. we waited about an hour and still no call.. Ron called again.. when he hung up the phone the Dr. called right back.. I told the Dr. what was going on.. he told me .."Get to the ER or Urgent Treatment Center NOW".. Ron took me to the UTC.. the doc there checked me out.. and tested me.. the tests showed that I had a kidney infection of the worst order.. he said that I had had this thing for at least two weeks and had been lucky to have not had more symptoms.. he wanted to put me in the hospital.. I didn't like that idea.. he reluctantly agreed to let me stay home and rest as long as I wasn't doing anything.. and by not doing anything he meant nothing at all.. he was adamant about that.. I agreed.. ( I don't like hospitals) he finally found an antibiotic that was strong enough for the infection and that I am not allergic to.. and sent me on my way..

Monday is pretty much a fevered blur.. Tuesday I can recall with effort.. Wednesday I felt somewhat better and went with Ron to an Awards ceremony for the tech schools of our fine state.. I probably shouldn't have gone.. I still felt like hell.. I slept the entire way there.. but I am glad I did go.. I got to spend the whole day with my hubby, and I got to hear a wonderful speaker who almost convinced me to become a teacher..( he was really good)..

Today.. I managed to get dressed.. Take the kids to school and I have done one load of laundry.. I am taking it way easy today though.. I am not going to push myself..( hush Ron and the rest of ya that know me) I am taking this seriously.. I have not been incapacitated by illness very often in my life.. I don't like it.. and even as stubborn as I am I am not taking any chances with this thing.. I am up to about 75% feeling like me again.. I want to do more than I can do.. but I am not gonna push.. so.. here I sit.. looking around seeing all the things I could be doing.. and not doing them.. It will make me crazy I am sure.. It has already made me grumpy.. ( sorry Honey, sorry kids) but, I will just have to deal with it.. I want this infection gone completely..

I think I am gonna apply for this job Ron sent me and take my happy little butt back to the couch, move the dogs and lay down for a bit..

Y'all have fun..

Highly Ticked Off

This will not be a pleasant blog.. I am pissed right the hell off.. I am glad AOL screwed up while I was trying to get to my blog this morning or this thing could be filled with all sorts of vile invective.. Anyway.. on to the story..

The guy that Chris got into the fight with on halloween has been harassing us.. he does things like walk around with a baseball bat swinging it at the people living in this house.. he grabs his testicles and penis and shakes them at Chelsea.. he threatens Kyle.. he blows kisses at me at the girls.. he also has made pelvic thrusting motions at Chelsea, Sierra and me while grabbing himself.. white guy's impersonation of Michael Jackson? I think not.. this guy is dangerous.. Chris' atty told us to call the police and document everything he does.. we have been doing that.. the thing is.. when he does these things he does them and then gets in his car and leaves.. by the time the police get here he is gone..

Yesterday he was grabbing himself and dancing like a chicken in his front yard all for Chelsea's benefit.. she came in and told me.. I called the police.. they took a report and gave us a case # then they told me to go down this morning and file a criminal charge against him.. Chelsea and I went down there this morning and talked to the County Attorney.. He tells us we can't file a cross complaint against him due to the pending charges against Chris.. He outlined our options.. we can call Chris' attorney everytime this jerk does something, we can document all the things he does with video and written documentation.. we can move..

I cannot believe that I can't file a criminal case against this guy because of the pending case against my son.. what he is doing to the rest of us has nothing to do with the case against Chris.. are we supposed to give up our home, our peace, our comfort all because he and Chris got into a fight?.. I don't have any case against this guy.. my son is an adult.. he is harassing me and my other children .. why do we suddenly lose our rights?.. I just don't understand it.. I honestly wouldn't understand it if it were Chris wanting to file a complaint against him.. just because they got into a fight doesn't mean this guy can't harass him.. ya know.. it is almost like this dude became an entity the moment he filed charges against Chris.. and is now untouchable.. that isn't what I think our system of justice was intended to do.. but what the hell do I know..

All I can say for him is he might wanna put on a smile when he is doing his little charades.. he will be on candid camera.. I am tired of this bullshit.. I am not gonna put up with it anymore and I am not one to give up.. I will catch him in the act.. I don't know if it will do any good but there will be tape.. there will be written documentation.. and the police will get to know me by my first name.. I don't cower to anyone.. and this guy isn't gonna make me have to move.. he is not going to make me give up my home.. he is not going to scare me.. and he is not going to terrorize my children.. hmm does it sound like I have had enough?...

I will be back when I am in a better mood.. I think I am gonna go find some housecleaning to take my frustrations out on..

Honey.. I am fine.. just pissed.. you know me.. I don't stay pissed long..don't worry bout me.. (like that will stop ya)

Y'all have fun..

Just Another Monday

The kids are at school..Ron is at work.. Chris is sleeping on the couch and talking to himself.. and I am doing my regular thing.. Nuttin.. I have cleaned already, typed up a resume' for Mary.. done laundry, and laid out the chicken for dinner.. I have now completed most of what I have to do today.. The only have to's left on the list are picking up kids this afternoon and taking Chris to work at 5.. woo hooo.. sounds exciting don't it?

I don't know what my problem is lately.. I feel so dang restless.. I know part of it is wanting a job.. I am looking.. I put in 4 applications this morning alone.. Most of my days I put in from 2 to 10 resume's or applications.. I know, based on the law of averages alone I should find something soon.. the problem is until then.. I am here doing nothing but vegetating.. I don't feel like keeping the house and feeding folks is such a big thing.. I have been doing that all of my life.. I started taking care of the entire household when I was 12.. so now it is nothing for me to clean and cook.. just an ordinary part of life.. Ron always comments on how well I take care of him.. I don't see it as me doing anything spectacular.. I just do the things a wife and mother does.. it is that simple..

I know I bitch a lot about not having a job.. but truthfully folks.. it is making me a bit nuts.. I long to put on nice clothes and go to the office, store, whatever.. and put in my hrs doing whatever job I have to do.. and bringing home a paycheck to not only help out around here, but to feel like I have accomplished something..

I have always been a classic overacheiver.. I had to get the best grades.. I had to work twice as hard as everyone else, just to get personal satisfaction from my job.. I still feel this way.. but ya know.. there is only so much satisfaction you can get from having a clean toilet.. Ok.. whining is done for the day.. I can cross that off my to do list..

My honey is sick today.. I really wanted him to stay home.. but being a workaholic/perfectionist like him.. I knew he would go in.. I even tried to guilt him into staying home by bringing up the old " you don't wanna get your students sick" argument.. but that was the good part of him going in for him..Just Kidding..

I just worry about him.. He was running a fever this morning.. and has been feeling pukey.. I just don't think teaching electricity today is as good a plan as staying home and being pampered by me.. but what do I know..

I guess I will get back to my job hunting.. who knows maybe I'll find something today..

Y'all have fun..

Nanny Day

First thing this morning.. I was sitting here checking my e mail and basically doing nothing.. My phone rings.. It is Chas wanting to know if I would mind watching Ian today.. I was like are you kidding.. Mind???? I never mind watching my lil Ian... I love having the little guy around...I told her.. bring him on.. she says " sorry about it being such short notice" I told her.. you don't need to give me a lot of notice to bring Ian.. Just make sure I am home.. So.. Ian and I are watching "Gremlins" and playing with Lacey.. for some reason she loves Ian and he loves her.... Malcolm is another story .. He is so big , he sometimes scares Ian.. we have taught him to tell Malcolm to " go away" it seems to be working, although Malcolm has no idea why he has to go away.. he loves kids and doesn't understand that kids are sometimes intimidated by his size..

There really doesn't seem to be much else to blog about today.. and I won't be doing a whole lot else today.. My wrists are hurting.. and Frankly.. it is just too dang cold out to do much.. I do need to go get dog food later.. I am sure Malcolm and Lacey would agree that is a good plan.. too bad neither of them can drive..

Y'all have fun..

The Year Begins..

Wow.. I just looked at my last post .. Has it really been that long.. Oh well so goes life.. I could say that I have been busy.. and I have.. I could say Ron has been on the computer.. which he has.. the whole truth is I don't think I really have that much to say..

New Year's Eve was wonderful.. we went out with friends.. one of them is a girl we don't know too well but she turned out to be a trip when she drinks.. who knew.. I just had a ball watching and listening to her.. we of course sang our butts off..well maybe not off.. just sang a lot..

The first week of this exciting new year has started off strangely.. Those of you that read Ron's blog know about the waterbed disaster.. I am happy to tell ya it is fixed.. there was a little tiny elephant earring stuck under the mattress causing the leak. Yeah Honey I know that is exactly what you said it was gonna be that caused it.. After retrieving my earring and patching the tiny little hole we filled the mattress back up with water and got to sleep in our bed last night.. I didn't even mind that it was cold.. I was just happy to not have 3 ft of me hanging off the end of the couch.. Ron can sleep sitting up.. Not me.. I can fall asleep anywhere.. but to stay asleep I have to have somewhere to put these long legs of mine..

The "bug" has been making it's rounds around here.. Chris, Sierra, Kyle, and Ron have had the worst of it.. I have felt nauseous.. but nothing major.. Chelsea seems to be immune.. The brat.... I think if your entire family is gonna be sick you should at least pretend to be sick with them... It is only fair that everyone suffer..

Today is my mom's b day.. I will be heading to the nursing home soon... I don't know if she knows it is her birthday or even if she knows what a birthday is.. but I know.. and I think after all she has been through in her life.. we should celebrate her 74th with her or for her..Maybe it is just me trying to keep her more with me than she can be.. maybe it is just that I can't face the fact that she isn't the person she used to be.. but, a part of me thinks that she is in there.. she knows.. she can understand on some level that I am still here and that I won't ever let her just fade away in that place.. I want my mother back.. I know I can't have that.. there is nothing that can keep me from hanging on to her for as long as I can..

I still have about a million things to do today.. I have managed to clean the bedroom after all the waterbed mess.. and to do a bunch of laundry.. I took Chris' boss his work excuse so he won't lose his job.. I am supposed to take Sierra to the Dr. and I still have to take the mattress back we bought and didn't need.. so.. I guess I should get off here and get going..

Y'all have fun..

Catching Up and Socks

Ok.. Time to catch up.. Christmas was wonderful.. busy.. but wonderful.. between dinner at the inlaws and dinner at one of the 5 daughters house and church and all the other things we did it was a very busy Christmas.. Can't wait for New Year's....

Moving right along to the sock thing... Never Never Never did we ridicule Ron and his sock Christmas gift solution.. We merely pointed out that socks are not an all encompassing gift.. Don't get me wrong.. I have cold feet most of the time.. I know the value of a good warm pair of socks.. but I like my Gremlins video ( one of this years gifts) and my Blue Topaz ring from last year a lot better than I could love a pair of socks...lets face it .. I would look strange wearing a sock on the middle finger of my left hand next to my wedding band.. and as far as watching a sock.. hmmm does the phrase watching paint dry suddenly seem exciting?... and Ron.. honey.. I don't think you would be able to use your brain with a sock as much as you do with the puzzle thingy I got you for the computer.. just my opinion.. Socks do have their place on any Christmas shopping list.. they are great for Grampa.. for Dad .. when you don't know what else to get someone.. they are great for uncle/ cousin bubba you haven't seen in 20 yrs who just shows up to let us know he is out.. oh wait that is my family .. not Ron's.. anywho.. I will go out on a limb here and say that socks are an appropriate gift for some people some of the time.. and anything I get from my kids or my honey is accepted as a great gift..but .. Socks are NOT the be all end all of gifts.. No Way No How.. But I do know what Ron is getting next year from everyone.. trust me honey.. you won't have to worry about Kyle the sock thief for a long long time... Love you baby..

Y'all have fun..

Winding Up and Winding Down..

With 3 days left til Christmas I have to wind up the shopping before I wind myself down.. I have a problem with Holiday Shopping.. I don't like to shop.. I may have mentioned this before.. but, perhaps I didn't make it clear.. when given the choice to go shopping with friends or have a long dental procedure done minus painkillers.. I seriously would consider the dental work.. I just don't like to shop..

Ron will disagree or at least wonder where it is his money goes.... I do love to thrift store shop.. I love garage sales.. and I love auctions.. I simply don't like the whole go to a crowded mall getting sneezed and coughed on by dozens of people, shoving and pushing to get the one of a kind OVERPRICED, piece of whatever and then having to haul it the 10 miles to the parking lot, then spend 20 minutes trying to get out of the parking lot.. NOPE.. not my thing..

I don't even like grocery shopping.. I can take a list of 50 things in the store, get them all and be outta there in 10 mins flat.. I see no reason to hang out.. I know what I want.. I can read fast enough to get the cheapest of what I need without turning it into a monumental decision.. I know when I go in there what I am gonna be cooking.. I don't need to hang out in the produce section to find that Perfect head of lettuce.. I get the best looking of the lot presented to me and move along.. I do check my bread for freshness, it just doesn't take me half the day to do it.. There is no reason for me to be there all day.. they still have the same things they had last week.. and if by chance they do have something new.. chances are it isn't gonna be something I need to study to know whether I want to buy it or not..

With all that said.. we have 4 people left on the list to buy for.. when this is done.. I will be able to relax and wind down.. did I mention I obsess about things.. I don't like shopping but I like to make sure we have everything we need when we need it.. Lordy I am a mess.. oh well .. time to get outta here and do what has to be done.. Have a great day

Taxi Driving and Being In Love ..

I haven't had time to blog much lately due to the fact that I have become the taxi service for everyone around here.. Chris hasn't worked all week because the weather has been basically crappy for landscaping.. But everyone else around here seems to need me to take them somewhere for something.. Angie has a job now she needs a ride to work.. Chelsea has been doing the last minute push with her grades and staying after school for extra credit (when she isn't having ear infections and coming home early) Kyle is easy.. he doesn't need me to take him anywhere for anything..except Christmas shopping this weekend.. he has 50 bucks and he intends to spend it.. I guess I am just tired.. I know it is not my job to save the world.. I know I don't have any obligation to Angie and Pete..I know I don't have to do half the things I do..but I can't help wanting to help.. that is just in my nature.. I guess it goes along with my trying to take care of everyone thing..

Other than running around like a chicken with its head off.. I am hurting.. my wrists (plural) are both hurting all the time now.. I know why the right one is hurting.. I guess the left one is hurting due to the amount of work I expect of it.. but dang.. It is bad enough being one handed and living my life.. but being no handed ain't working for me..

There is a wonderful side to all of this hurting.. Ron is not the type of man to comment on the lack of housework.. or complain when dinner is not on the table when he walks through the door.. or wonder what I do all day.. I went through that with my ex.. I was telling Ron last night about an experience with my ex.. I had pnuemonia and a fever of 103, I was under doctors orders to stay my happy lil butt in bed.. but I did get up and do a few things.. I knew that Ronnie would bitch if the house wasn't clean.. when he came home from work he asked me why dinner wasn't ready.. I was like.." Hello.. I am sick".. (didn't make an impression on him).. Ron doesn't understand why his sensitivity and understanding mean so much to me.. perhaps a couple of you ladies could clue him in.. when a woman is used to being treated a certain way.. and then finds someone that is sweet, kind, understanding, and doesn't treat them that way, It is kinda like moving to another planet.. Ron..I wrote a poem for you once.. "can he ever know".. re read it sometime.. it is just a fraction of how your love makes me feel..

Ok.. I need to get these achy hands off the keyboard for a while.. y'all have fun..

Un Cluttering

I have gone on a bit of a cleaning spree today.. Our apartment while being large for our area is getting a bit cluttered.. ok.. a lot cluttered.. it isn't the 9 computers or the 3 tvs.. or the 4 stereos that is causing the problems.. it is all the other stuff we have.. mostly in our room it is the clothes.. Ron has more clothes than I do.. I don't know why he has all of these clothes.. he doesn't wear 80% of them.. they just hang in the closet.. or reside in the 2 large storage bins in the basement or in the other bin in the laundry room.. It doesn't bother me that he has all of them.. it bothers me I have no place to put them..

Then there are the bulky things.. the dressers, ava's tank, the hutch.. the kingsized water bed.. all of these things are in our room too.. it just adds up to an obsessive compulsive, perfectionist's nightmare.. that would be me.. I don't mind a little clutter but there are times when I feel like all this stuff around here is closing in on me.. I know there is a plot where all of the extra stuff around here is planning a takeover of the house.. Ron is gonna come home one day and find a big pile of his clothes has attacked and subdued me.. honest.. I can see it now...

At any rate I did manage to re assign things to the hall closet.. that thing is gonna explode if I put one more thing in it.. but at least it isn't in the bedroom anymore.. I have also managed to mop the floors and catch up on laundry.. I am having a good wrist day.. I have taken my prescription meds and a couple advil.. it is down to a dull throb right now.. so I feel good enough to get some much needed cleaning done....

Ron and I had a great weekend.. lazy but good.. I like days that I don't have to go everywhere for everyone.. and I really like spending most of the day in bed with Ron.. what more could a woman want..

I did have a great phone call today.. Russ called me.. just to catch up on things here and to let me know he is still alive and kicking.. this is a good thing.. It was good to hear from him.. Miss ya dude..

Well time to go check on the honey mustard glazed chicken I am cooking for dinner and start the rice.. come on over supper is at 5ish..

Y'all have fun..

Lacey

Lacey is my 6lb mini dachshund who is about a year old and may not (after what she did this morning) be living much longer.. I don't know why I keep doing this to myself.. I love animals.. I would probably take in every stray I could if I had the room and if Ron didn't tell me NO!! It seems like every one I do take in is defective in some way.. Perhaps that is part of their charm.. The first of the defective dogs was Donavon.. he was a transvestite pomeranian with a serious personality disorder.. he would steal my bras , panties, shirts and nighties and prance around the house with them.. he would also sit in a corner and stare at people without wanting anyone to pet him or pay attention to him.. but his greatest trick was shitaporting.. read Ron's blog from last year to figure that one out..

Then there was Cleo.. I didn't take her in as much as got stuck with her.. Ok Ok Honey yes I wanted her.. this dog was not only obsessive compulsive.. but she was demon dog from hell.. she could tear things up while you were in the same room with her.. and she didn't like Kyle.. she mistook him for a chew toy a couple times.. I thought when we got her she would be more like her dad (Malcolm) I was wrong.. not that Malcolm is a perfect dog by any means but when you compare him to my dogs.. yeah.. he is an angel..

Now we come to lacey.. she is a cutie.. she doesn't shitaport.. she doesn't bite.. she isn't obsessive compulsive.. she is however the first dog with incurable ADHD I have ever met.. this dog is like a long rat on speed.. she is all over the place all at once.. and she does have a nasty habit of tearing up things.. she is in trouble today for tearing up the Christmas Tree skirting.. She is kennel trained and will go into her kennel if you tell her to go to her room. Problem this morning was I forgot to tell her..After everything I went through to get the tree up.. I was not amused by the distruction of the white, fluffy , sparkly skirting ... Oh well at least she isn't wearing my clothes..
yet..

Y'all have fun..

Pain In The Wrist

I don't have much to blog about today.. and even if I did.. I wouldn't be able to blog long anyway.. the wrist is acting up today.. Actually it has been about 3 days so far that I haven't been able to pick up anything heavier than a feather or to type for longer than 5 minutes at a time.. I am not whining.. just letting y'all know if ya don't see me for a couple of days .. that is why..

The thing that bothers me the most about this is not the pain.. pain is something I can and have handled a lot of in my life.. the thing that bothers me is that the pain keeps me from doing the things I want and need to do.. I don't like to be told I can't do something let alone being physically stopped from doing it.. but anywho..I need to get off here and heat this thing with the heating pad for a bit.. I do still have kids to pick up this afternoon and driving isn't fun with this thing hurting like this..

Y'all have fun..

Public Safety Announcement

Ok.. If you drive in or around Lexington KY be warned..Chris got his permit today.. He will be driving.. now I can mark that off my list of good deeds for the day..

Thanksgiving went well.. we didn't have all the kids over.. or the grandkids.. they were all busy doing other things.. but it was still good with the 3 that live here.. Tommy, Pete , Angie and Billy came down to share a meal and a word of thanks.. all was good..

Today has been a strange day.. other than fearing for my life from time to time with Chris behind the wheel it has been ok.. We did have a minor incident involving Tommy and the Dollar Tree.. but that mostly stemmed from the incident last night involving Chelsea, Tommy and the Dollar Tree.. it is a bit much to go into right now..but it did lead to an interesting if somewhat heated (on my part) discussion with Ron about where we come from... he and I are from totally different places in life.. I grew up poor and not only on the wrong side of the tracks but there were no right sides in our neighborhood.. I tried to explain to him that when you are from that place you tend to look out for things to happen whether you do anything wrong or not... He doesn't understand my distrust of cops.. he simply is from another place.. I am glad he had the upbringing he did.. that is part of why he is who he is.. same as me.. If I had not came up the way I did I wouldn't be the me that I am.. sometimes it seems that although we are from the same town we grew up on different planets..I don't envy his life.. I don't feel cheated by mine.. It is just a difference in culture and what expectations we have grown to have.. he expects to be treated the way he treats everyone.. with respect, honor, and a sense of right and wrong.. I expect someone to screw with me at any moment.. I don't trust anyone.. ( Ron excluded of course ) until I have a reason to.. he trusts everyone until he has a reason not to.. We are who we are.. and thank God our differences in this are not a breaking point but a linking point to understanding each other..

It is strange however, that someone like him and someone like me have so many things that are alike.. down to the same favorite candy bar.. I guess with so much in common in other ways.. the differences just allow us individuality and a great way to start conversations.. well Chelsea time..

Y'all have fun..

Thankful

Thanksgiving.. The shopping is done.. the turkey is quietly thawing in the fridge.. the pie stuff is just waiting for me to get in there and start mixing.. everything is ready all I have to do is cook.. oh yeah.. did I mention that I am cooking for about 23 this year?.. Sounds like a lot doesn't it.. It is.. but to me.. It is wonderful to know that I am cooking for my family.. they will all be here.. perhaps not all at the same time.. but sometime during the day I will get to spend some time with and feed the people I hold dearest to me.. who could ask for a better Thanksgiving than that..

Our family has a tradition of telling what we are thankful for this year.. from the youngest to the oldest.. we have had thankfullness for everything from rollerblades to gravy.. for me.. I am always thankful for the same things.. My kids.. My love.. My home.. the fact that I do have food to prepare.. the simple things like that.. Those things mean more to me than anything else I could think of.. I know that a lot of people are thankful for these things.. for me.. it is my life. When I was a kid.. I wanted to be a mom.. a wife.. and a doctor.. in that order.. I never got around to the med school thing.. but heck I'm only 37 who knows.. anyway.. I became a mom really young.. probably before I should have.. but it worked for me.. I became a wife before most people have gone to the prom.. this too worked for me..

I look back at my life and realize.. for all the hardships.. for all the times I thought I couldn't go on.. I have gained strength.. for all the times I wondered if anyone would love and cherish me the way I needed them to.. I look at Ron.. and I know that although I don't know why he does.. he gives me all I dreamed of having as a wife..

Some of my friends that know my life are amazed that I am as sane ( yeah right) and as happy as I am.. I have had people tell me .. " I don't think I would have survived the things you have" I don't think of myself as a survivor.. I am just an ordinary woman that just happened to have been blessed with an extraordinary life.. Yep.. I said blessed.. for all that has been wrong, bad, terrible, dramatic or otherwise damaging in my life.. I have had the most wonderful rewards.. I wouldn't trade a minute of the hardship, if I knew I would have to give up one minute of the love, hope, strength, friendship, and all the other rewards that I have been able to experience.. So.. this year.. instead of being thankful just for all I have.. I am thankful for all I didn't have.. those things helped to shape me just as much..

Y'all have a wonderful Thankgiving..I need to go organize the cooking space .. and the table .. and the living room.. and the.. well you understand..

Chris Is HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here is the news... Chris. .He is home.. he has to be home or with me or at work at all times.. but he is home.. he can be here for Thanksgiving.. that brings me great joy.. I hated the thought of him not being home for Turkey Day.. that really sucked.. but he is home.. I am happy.. I know there is a long way to go with this thing but, I also know.. this part is over.. the guidelines he has to follow are minimal compared with spending more time in jail.. he is happy..

The only other thing is I have a terrible cold.. no way I'm gonna get to rest.. but what is new about that.. Having been a mom since I was 17.. I am used to not having any rest.. I don't really mind too much.. I have my kids... I know they are all safe and happy.. I have my Poet.. I try to take care of him.. and he most definately takes care of me.. all is good..

Time to get back on the road..

Y'all have fun

Tears and Fears

Today has been a tearful day for me.. I have been crying or at least leaking about the eyes whole day.. some of it is hormonal I know.. Mother nature came to call this morning.. most of it is about Chris.. this I know..

I got an email from his girlfriend today.. she made me cry.. Beek.. is a great girl.. she loves my son.. I have never doubted that.. she has stood by him for more than 3 yrs , through all he has done and all he has put her through.. Including breaking her heart and marrying someone else.. She doesn't take any bullshit from him.. but she never stopped loving him.. that is a good thing.. her family has been there for Chris as well .. I know a lot of parents if their daughter was involved with a kid in a situation like Chris' would try to talk the kid into breaking up.. but her parents have been here for her and for Chris.. they have gone above and beyond in supporting not only them .. but me as well Thank You..

Beek is a smart kid, she is sweet and just generally a good person.. I have seen since they have been back together that Chris is more the person I knew he could be.. I think they are good for each other..

Other than all of this.. nothing new to talk about.. I have about a million errands to run today.. everyday life stuff.. hopefully doing day to day things will help me to cope with everything else.. or at least take my mind off of it..

Y'all have fun

The Case Continues

Today we had the preliminary hearing for Chris.. we both got to meet his attorney for the first time.. (C0mforting ain't it to meet him on the day of the hearing).. aside from just meeting him today.. he turned out to be a pretty smart fella.. he told us what to expect.. he explained everything well.. Court proceeded.. Chris' bond was reduced from 7500 to 2500.. donations are still being accepted...We did have a witness that was able to recount what had happened and that Chris was not the aggressor but truly defending himself.. ( I am proud of you T. you did a great job)..Chris' attorney says that the judge was leaning towards our side by reducing the bond as much as she did and that the prosecution is no longer so sure of their side because of some remarks made in the courtroom by the lead prosecutor..I'll just take his word for it.. I don't really know enough about the judicial system to be an accurate judge of who is leaning what way in a trial..

Then there has been the Chelsea and her mystery pain in the side.. She has been suffering from some pain in her side for the last week.. we have made several trips to the doctor's office.. we have had no real diagnosis.. Until yesterday.. We made an appt for yet another trip to the dr.. this time her regular dr was there.. he suggested an X-ray of her chest and abdomen.. when he got the X-rays he called me into the other room to look at them with him.. and he says in his most serious Doctor tone.. Maam, your daughter's problem is she is full of shit.. he is a great doctor with a wonderful sense of humor.. and that is what the X-ray showed.. it seems Chelsea could benefit from more fiber in her diet.. so it is off to the grocery for some pruns and bran flakes.. Yummy.....but at least we know she is ok.. and that the pain can be fixed.. it is about time something around here is fairly easily remedied....

Through all of this.. Ron has been wonderful.. he always has the chest ready for me to lay my head.. he has a hug and a shoulder for my tears.. and he has a great cure for my inability to sleep.. He has kept me sane ( mostly) through this.. This entire thing is tearing me apart.. emotionally, mentally and physically.. Ron helps me deal day to day.. he helps me keep in perspective that this is nothing I could have prevented.. this is not the result of my parenting.. this is the result of choices made by Chris and John.. no one else.. I do have a tendancy to blame myself for anything that brings harm to my children.. even the things they do to themselves.. I guess that is just part of being a mom..

Well it is about time to go get miss full of it from school.. Y'all have fun..

Court

Today was Chris' arraignment, we sat through the process of all the people ahead of Chris being arraigned at the same time. There were several people with much more serious charges than Chris' some where given a reduced bond.. one in particular was up on about 15 charges including having sex with a minor.. his bond was 2500 and was reduced to 10%.. when Chris came up.. The judge refused to reduce his bond and was rather snotty about the charge being so serious.. so I guess in KY it is ok to sleep with children but get in a fight and defend yourself and you are outta luck.. Hmm can ya tell I'm pissed right now?..

His next court date is Tues of next week perhaps at that time he will be able to get a reduction.. I did call his job this morning and let them know what is going on.. they are great.. they want him back.. they think it is a shame that a kid like Chris is involved in something like this.. He is a great worker.. they miss him on the crew.. I did manage to get the letter from his boss to the judge and that will go into his file so when he does get an attorney the attorney will be able to bring up the fact that Chris is not a flight risk, he has a job, he is a resident of our city and state, he has significant ties to the community and the fact that Chris has no criminal record should be enough to get a bond reduction.. we have the 10% there is just no way we can come up with 7500 dollars..

Other things going on today.. Kyle had a Dr. appt this morning to discuss his weight and some other concerns.. he was put on a 2500 calorie diet and tested for Thyroid function.. Hopefully the tests will come back normal and we will find out the boy just likes to eat..

While we were waiting for Kyle to get called back to see the Dr. I was going through my purse..I have this makeup bag in there filled with letters and poems and all sorts of things like that.. Mementos of the past and I realized something.. I am not a materialistic person by any stretch of the imagination.. I do have things that mean a lot to me.. things that would break my heart to lose..the things in that little makeup bag are more precious to me than any material possessions could ever be.. there are letters from Ron, old e mails, poems he has written, the original version of the poem I wrote for my grandson, a letter from Sierra telling me when she was considering having sex for the first time, a letter from Chelsea telling me she is sorry for screwing up, a certificate Chelsea made for me in english class.. those things cannot be replaced.. they hold a place in my heart that nothing else could ever fill. If I lost these things it would hurt. but the love they came from would still exist, it would still be in my heart and the hearts of those people I hold dearest in the world.. I may not be wealthy in the conventional sense.. but upon reading these outpourings of love and inspiration from my husband and children I realized.. there is no on richer than I am.. I have the love of a wonderful man.. and the admiration, respect and love of my children.. what more could I ask for..

Y'all have fun..

King's Island and Other Adventures

Yesterday.. It was proven to me that I am in fact not as young as I used to be..Kings Island is great.. but it seriously kicked my butt.. I have pain in places I didn't even know I had.. My back, my neck.. and some strange little place in my upper thigh that I didn't know could hurt..but other than that we had a wonderful time.. we rode roller coasters, walked all over the place.. took in the sights and sounds of the carnival atmosphere and just generally enjoyed being a family.. It was a great break from the drama around here..

Speaking of the drama around here.. Chris was arrested today... the detective in the case has been very kind to us.. he let Chris stay home for the weekend.. he waited until today to come pick him up.. Thank you Det. Wilson.. he didn't have to do the things he did.. he didn't have to be nice.. trust me here in Lexington , nice is not a priority for cops.. just my opinion..

Chris is going to court in the morning, perhaps if we are fortunate he will get 10% of the bond amount and we will be able to get him out of jail..and he will be home to await further court dates.. if not he will have to stay in jail for at least a week until he can get a bond reduction hearing..

The situation sux.. Chris should have walked away.. he should have just come on home.. but a 19 yr old kid ain't gonna react that way.. His reaction was to ask this asshole why he is always trying to start something with everyone.. why he runs his mouth and threatens people.. this guy has threatened me, Chelsea , Justin.. hell I am surprised he hasn't threatened Kyle.. they guy is a steroid user with a bad temper... he thinks he is billy bad ass as long as it is someone he perceives as being weaker than him..

Well it is about Kyle 30.. time to get outta here.. wish me luck with my drama.. and prayers are always appreciated..

Y'all have fun

The Young and The Restless

I feel like my life is one long soap opera lately.. I would like to go through one week.. one day.. hell hour without some sort of drama.. It seems like every time I turn around there is something going on around here with one of the kids.. Ron and I don't have or cause a lot of drama on our own.. we are quiet ( well he is) for the most part..

I am getting to the point where answering my phone is a gamble.. answering the the door is never a good plan.. does there ever come a point in your life when your kids stop making you crazy?

If you read Ron's blog you know what is going on.. if not.. then you will have to look for his to find out.. I just don't have the heart to type it..

Last night was the first night since Sunday that I have gotten more than 2 hrs sleep.. I am paying for it today.. I feel like I have a mild hangover.. but I am in a better mood than I have been in all week.. that is a good thing.. people can speak to me now and still keep their heads..

Oh wait.. more drama.. this time not with the kids.. Ron just called me to tell me that his school is on lockdown right now and has been for the last hr and a half.. it is not life threatening.. ok.. good.. but is that supposed to stop me from worrying .. I think not.. will let ya know what happens.. well one of us will anyway..

Y'all have fun